Age is Just a Number—But Ageism is Loud

Last week, I had the honor of DJing an incredible event called BizLifeCon: For Women 40+, where business, life, and big moves collide. The energy in that room? Unmatched. These women were inspiring, sharp, stylish, powerful. I was proud to be in their presence, and even prouder to be a part of it.

Here’s the thing: I’m 45. And apparently, I don’t “look it.” I get comments like that all the time. But what really gets me is that people often don’t even know how old I am because they never ask. Maybe it’s because I don’t fit their idea of what 45 is supposed to “act” or “look” like. Maybe it’s because I’m living confidently, doing what I love, and refusing to shrink myself to fit anyone’s comfort zone.

But let me tell you what isn’t so inspiring: the way some people weaponize my age when they don’t like what I have to say.

It’s funny…people don’t seem to have a problem with me until I speak up. Whether I’m calling out injustice, setting boundaries, or letting someone know they’ve hurt me, suddenly the conversation shifts. That’s when an age comment will take place. Passive-aggressive remarks, dismissive tones. All of a sudden, I’m “too old” to express myself or have a valid opinion or I’m “doing too much for a certain age.” As if growth and accountability have an expiration date.

But let me make this clear: calling me out on my age doesn’t hurt me...not one bit. It’s comical. Like… that’s your angle? That’s all you’ve got? I’m 45, thriving, and apologetically taking up space. If the best you can do is talk about my age, you’ve already shown your hand, and it’s weak.

What cracks me up even more? Some of these people throwing shade are younger than me by a decade or more… and already look like life is wearing them down. That’s what happens when you carry bitterness, jealousy, and judgment around with you and it shows. That kind of energy ages you faster than time ever could.

Meanwhile, I’m over here glowing. Not just because of good skin, but because I’m living authentically. I’m rooted in purpose, surrounded by love, and building a career I’m proud of. I’m a force in my industry, and I’m only getting better with age.

So if the only thing people can use to try and bring me down is how long I’ve been alive? That’s not an insult. That’s a badge of honor.

Ageism is real. It shows up in the workplace, in friendships, in family, in dating. It shows up anytime someone tries to make you feel “less than” because of your age especially when you’re confident and visible. But age isn’t something to hide or shrink from. It’s something to celebrate.

So to anyone who feels like age is a barrier to achieving greatness, being beautiful, or living boldly throw that mindset out the window. You are as powerful as you decide to be. You are as relevant as you allow yourself to feel. And you are as young as your spirit chooses to stay.

I plan to keep showing up, glowing up, and speaking up, no matter how many candles are on my cake. Anyone saying otherwise still has a lot of growing up to do spiritually & emotionally.